August 31, 2004

Interesting Correlations

I was at the top of a fairly high hill today, looking down over the city and the outlying countryside today, and I was struck by how beautiful it really seems. But as I walked down the hill, I again saw what we see on a daily basis, the destruction, the dirt, and the misery in which we live our daily lives. It also seems to be that way in the hierarchy of life. Those that are above seem only to see the beauty, whereas those of us on the bottom see things as they truly are. Do those higher up forget from whence they came? Or do they choose to block it from mind? It reminds me of a anecdote I once saw about how stupid things become reality. It starts on the lower level, with the lowest saying it is shit, and continues up the chain, with each retelling though it gains a little more dignity, so by the time it reaches the top, it seems to be the best thing in the world. So they make it policy. It was amusing but oh so true in this life.

August 29, 2004

Too darned EARLY

Was up until well after midnight last night, though NOT by choice. About 1930 we got a call to run a quick mission to the camp next door and pick up some personnel returning from leave. We headed out around 2000, and got to the place rather quickly where we waited, and waited, and waited some more. We made calls to figure out what was going on, and around 2230 they assured us that they were on their way. Around 2300, they figured out that they WERE'NT coming to where we were, but that they had no idea where they were. By the time they figured it out, it was midnight already! Oh well.
Was up around 0715 this morning, and I did NOT want to drag myself out of bed. I am entirely TOO tired!

Thoughts on life

To all who are now concerned as I tend to be a little voicferous at times, I am sorry. It is not my intention to upset you with my writings, as they are just an expression of how I feel at one particular point in time. This has become my venting point. If you have any thoughts though, on what I may write, please feel free to email me:) I always love getting emails.
Today has been a great day. After a brief spat of work this morning that needed to be done, I got to spend the ENTIRE day, lollygaggin around. It is a wonderful thing to do, but I don't recommend it frequently. Oddly enough, rather than being well rested, I am more tired. Too much sleep perhaps and not enough exercise:) Not a bother though, as I will sleep well tonight before another productive day at work begins anew tomorrow.

August 27, 2004

Another simple pleasure

Taking an hour in the mornings to get ready for work. Mind you I can be dressed and out the door in about 15 flat, but it is so nice to take my time. I like to indulge in a cup of tea, or a cappucino, while listening to music and getting dressed. It's fun. I also like to spend time occasionally on doing my hair into a new style, and putting on makeup, something I rarely do around here. (just not really worth it.) But, it is always nice, to walk out the door, take a quick peek in the mirror and just think 'Damn I look good today"

Good Morning!

Bright and awake, and yeah right. I hate dragging myself out of bed before the sun rises! But here I am, waiting for my company to return from their run. Ordinarily I would have been out riding my bike, but the 1SG wished to run this morning, so I am looking after the CP. Not a bad gig LOL:)
Life hasn't been all that bad, despite what you may think after my last posting. I was just furious, and it still gets me a bit steamed to think about it. But when all is said and done, I will still be the same respectful person that I always am. I have a slight mental block that doesn't allow me to be disrespectful of a person, to their face at least LOL. Something about not like trouble?! Hehehe. Of no matter. It's Saturday and tomorrow I shall be off all day, and get to play lounge lizard in my room.
I watched American Wedding finally last night. It was histarically funny, and off the wall. Dear g-d when and if I ever get married, I do not want a disaster as that. I realize that it was a movie and therefore imagined, but you never know what could happen.
Well, off I go to face another day in hell. Soon I will be home!

August 25, 2004

No More Miss Nice Girl?

Is that what it is going to take for people to take me seriously? Am I going to have to lock myself up into a shell, in order to gain the perception that I am competent? To gain respect? Am I so bad that persons must be warned to stay away from me? The latest and greatest amusement in the world of “who is she sleeping with now” is the rumour that I am trying to entice a young 19 y/o to my bed! This BOY is younger than my younger brother, and is someone that I have always been nice to, but that’s it. Apparently my friendliness on more than one occasion has been mistaken for overt flirtation. So it begs the question, should I no longer be a pleasant person, should I no longer be a friend? All it seems to have brought me is pain and hurt. These are people I have done everything within my power to help. Where others would deride, I would defend; where others would ignore, I would try to help. What has it brought me but further derision. What does it take? Frustration builds to a new level every time I hear of these matters. I don’t know just how much more I can take before I do shut down.

Bored

Stress free = bored:) Not neccesarily a bad thing, but I am the sort of person who enjoys being busy. Not to mention it also makes the time fly by faster.

August 23, 2004

Grrrrrrrrr

I hate my stupid alarm clock! I was up late last night and couldn't sleep, so apparently when I did go to sleep, I slept so deeply that I slept right through my alarm clock and missed PT. I hate it when I do that. My TL was cool about it though, and hopefully the day goes better from here:)

Nonsensical items

Item 1. Noticed while running around post taking the long way back after chow this evening: A BBQ grill built from what appears to be an old bomb. Almost ran myself off the road doing a double take at that one.
Item 2.Life in this unit. If it gets any worse I swear I will go outside at midnight and scream at the top of my lungs.
Item 3. I had more but I forgot while I was out doing my laundry.
Doing my own laundry is a necessity around here. The last time I sent my laundry to the KBR facility, I ended up with a ruined $30 Bra! I indulge so infrequently in expensive lingerie, that I prefer to keep it nice looking. So these days I have taken to doing my own wash, about twice a wee. Actually provides me with something to keep me occupied for an hour or 2 rather then die of boredom. Thanks be to Mummy who taught me to cook, clean, and wash my own blue jeans (Or DCU's as the case may be):-D

Let's go fly a kite

Winds around here are usually pretty strong, but apparently not strong enough to send up the little pocket kite I got while home on leave. It reminded me of a time abut 2 years ago, preparing for our first deployment over here. It was a lazy Saturday morning, and the marjority of my company was out at the warehouse trying to get things done. We had a lull in that time, and I went to my car and pulled my kite out of the trunk and started to attempt to fly it. Soon there were others joining in and before long we had it soaring in the parking lot. It caused a good deal of amusement in what was otherwise an aggravating day. My 1SG then said that no one should ever tell me to go fly a kite, as chances were good that I would. There is nothing more stress relieving sometimes then the simple things in life. Simple things that ordinarily seem silly, or dumb often have the power to make us forget where we are and what we are doing. And for those few moments of forgetfulness, life is good again.

Blase

Life is pretty good right now. Relaxed, stress free. busy, but still pretty good.:-D
So far, we have accomplished much in setting up, now for the getting into work pahse. Should be interesting.

August 22, 2004

Lazy mornings

Today is my usual day off, and for the first time in weeks I have not had to worry about waking up and going into the office to do my reports:-D Such a nice thing!
Shopping for school uniforms for my sisters. Always a fun thing, as I typically have to guess at sizes for these brats:) If they'd stop growing for a few seconds we would be doing good ROFL. Sheesh, I remember when I could pick the older ones up, and nowadays, they are taller than me!

August 21, 2004

Fun in the sun!

After a full days work, my TL released us early. We were very productive today outside, resulting in my arms now being covered in various little scratches. Quite alright though, just a sign of hard work.
As I have been working rather hard physically these last few days, I went to the pool this afternoon to relax and cool off. While I did cool off, I did not relax. A few friends were there and feeling frisky, as I couldn't stay on a raft to save my life. No sooner would I get on, then I would be promptly dumped back into the water. Laughter abounded, as well of shreiks (sue me if that isn't spelled right) of I'm going to get you! I did have the chance once again to prove my prowess in the water while swimming, when someone challenged me. He told me that I couldn't keep up with him! Excuse me, I didn't spend the summers of my childhood in the pool for nothing. He hehehe. Due to a lengthened armstroke, he did win, but NOT by much at all:-D All in all, I spent more time at the pool then I ever have, and had more fun then ever before. Between getting dunked, and dunking others, it was fun, and I am now very relaxed. As I have tomorrow off, I think I will spend the day in my room, watching dvd's. Or, better yet, reading a good romance;) Nothing like curling up with a cup of tea, or cappucino, and a good book, with good music in the background.

August 20, 2004

Worth

I have to admit that sometimes I wonder if what I do is worth anything. I wonder if anything I do matters, if it makes a difference. But that is neither here nor there for now.
I was up before the sunrise this morning for PT as usual, went out for a 6 mile bike ride. I am now in pain, but it is good pain. I am now sitting here, drinking coffee (A rarity for me), and preparing to face another day. Today I expect to be outside most of the day, cleaning up the outside of the building I have spent the last 2 days cleaning the inside of. In the last few days, I have put in more physical labour than I have done in a long time. Admitedly, it isn't very hard on the body to sit at a computer and type all day. Mentally I would go insane, but physically I was fine LOL:-D

August 19, 2004

paint splatters

I spent yesterday painting my new office with white paint, so as to help hide the graffiti that the previous occupants left behind. What I don't understand it why people feel the need to doodle things on the walls. For example, one bit of "poetry" left behind: "Grown men don't have emotions, that's why they are grown men" to which I turned and looked at my team mate and replied that grown men also don't doodle on walls. He thought that was funny. It is dumb and for the most part rather inane as you really have to wonder at their IQ level. Anyway, I naturally made a thorough mess of myself, as is my wont to do, and by the time we quit for the day, I was whiter than white. I looked as though most of the paint was on me rather than on the walls. Of course, I had a blast doing so.
These last few days have been extrodinarily stress free, it's been really nice.

August 18, 2004

New jobs

I spent the morning in the company of my new team, working, and getting to know each other. It was a good morning. So far, all is well.
I am sitting over lunch, hoping to see a good friend, before I have to go back to work. Hopefully I am able to see them.
This place gets more and more insane by the day.

August 17, 2004

Last day, dissapointments, and silliness

Well, last night I spent in a meeting with the other NCO's of what is soon to be my old company. The complete foolishness that takes place is unreal somedays. Last nights meeting centered on area beautification. Excuse me, but last time I checked we WERE in a combat zone. Granted, we do NOT need to live in a trash heap, but this extreme is a wee ridiculous.
We also had an announcment about wine, and it's presence in our area. Our Chaplains Assistant had recieved a box of wine for religious purposes only, and there were originally 4 bottles, but now they are down to 1. There was much laughter and joking about praising g-d and other bad jokes. Good for a moment of levity in what was otherwise an incredibly LONG meeting.
I spent a few minutes today inprocessing with my new company, and I am very apprehensive about it. This is new to me, and my only hope is that I do not screw things up, as I am apt to do occasionally.
I was dissapointed this morning, due to operational reasons, a friend was unable to come to camp, and thus I was not able to spend time with them. Oh well, such is the way of life in war. For a bit of irony I quote a close friend and say "War is Hell"

August 16, 2004

Not that bad

Ok, I realize that most everything I end up writing on here is bad, but that honestly is when it is easiest. But lest you all get the wrong idea, life here isn't really that bad. I get frustrated, but there are things that make this place endurable. A decent chow hall, the pool (which I do frequent occasionally, armed with SPF 30), and a really nice gym. So you see, living conditions aren't that bad. I think what really gets me mostly is the stupidity that occurs.
Right now, I am goofing off in my office, flipping around online looking at websites and what not. I now have my house furnished, my new car all planned out, and hell, even a few other things that I can't list here for fear of embarresment:)

Life changing decisions

Why is it that these are always the hardest to make? When faced with doing, or saying something that could change the course of my life, why is it so hard to choose what is the right thing to do or say? I am pretty bad about making decisions to start with, hell, I have a hard time deciding where to eat for dinner when I do go out. So here I sit, trying to decided the course of my life, and naturally, I havn't a clue.

Blah

This is one of those days, that just drags itself out as long as possible, so as to increase the agony of the sheer boredom that accompanies it. My brain just stubbornly refuses to even think about coming up with something witty:)

August 14, 2004

Ramblings of an insane soul

I was outside just now talking to one of my good friends, and he really helped put things into perspective for me. When expressing my reservations concerning this upcoming move, one of them is that I will no longer be in a position to make a positive impact on people’s lives, and that is something I always strive for. Instead of being responsible for a certain number of people, I won’t have anyone directly. But instead, he says to think of it this way, instead of directly supporting the BN, I will be helping thousands of people indirectly.
As per normal with any conversation these days, talk turned to going home. One of the things I intend on doing when I return stateside is putting in my recruiter packet. This is something I have thought about doing for a couple of years, as it is something I really want to do. I want to go out there, and show these young kids what a difference the Army makes. When I came in 4 ½ years ago, I came in because I had the view of the Army as an honorable profession, as patriotic. College money WASN’T my first motivator, though I will admit, it is a nice side bonus. I grew up seeing my Great-Grandfather, my Grandfather and my Uncle in the Army. They were and are honorable men that I admire greatly. When I decided the Military was an option for me, I didn’t have to go into any other recruiting office save the Army’s. I knew what I wanted to be, and that was a soldier. Anything else, I didn’t have a clue about. After all, I was a rather na├»ve 19 year old. But in the time since then, I have never regretted my decision, though it has led me all over the world, first to Korea, then Kuwait, and now into war in Iraq. I have faced challenges, both personally and professionally, and I have grown. I am different then that 19-year-old brat that came in with starry eyes. I have changed, and for the better. I want to go out there, and show these kids just what the Army can do for them. That the Army can take them so many places, literally and figuratively.
My friend suggested I write down these thoughts and I laughed, because they sound inane, like drilled responses one would expect from someone who had swallowed the party line whole. But, as he pointed out, if it sounds stupid and silly, it must make sense, after all this is the Army where if it is illogical and silly, it must be logical and wise.

Foregone Conclusions

People have pissed me off to the extreme. I know that I am unusual, that I may be different. Bu damn it I work hard, and I wish people would see that, and would learn how to put things unrelated to professional duties, aside. It is just incredibly frustrating to continue to walk into this wall that I am. When can I stop fighting, when can I put down arms, because someone is willing to give me a break? People need to realize that what seems to be there isn't always there.

Yawn

This is one of those days where I will be surprised if I stay awake the whole day.

August 13, 2004

days dragged by

Some day's such as today, just drag by. I finished my work this morning, and there really isn't much else today this afternoon. Soon, I will go do my laundry, and then settle down for another evening of peace and quiet. Since my room mate switched to nights, it's quiet in there:)

Changes

For being someone for whom change (Whether it be a hair colour, hairstyle, or men;) is a middle name (Along with all of the other adjectives applied to me, laudatory and derogatory), I dislike major changes, such as the one I am about to make. I like the comfortable, the known. For all that I am adventurous, I like certain things to never change. Now a major thing, my job, is about to change, and I have to admit, I am scared. Will I be horrid at this new job, will I be able to learn it fast enough? Will I just totally suck!? Will I even fit in? These are people that I have known for the most part for over 2 years, but still, most of them I have never worked with before. But, I have reassurance that there will be someone there, someone looking over me and helping me along. And I always know that there are certain people in my life, though while not here, will be there for me to reassure me.

August 12, 2004

Sunrise and bats

Because I have now devoted myself to making sure I do PT early in the morning, I am now getting up in the early dawn hours and riding to the gym. This morning though, I noticed a bunch of little flying creatures. While ordinarily I do not mind little flying creatures, it does kinda bother me when they fly right next to my head LOL. I hate waking up any earlier than I absolutly have to, but PT these days is helping my sanity. It gets my blood flowing nice and early, and I am able to come into work with a better attitude:)
It was extrordinarily nice this morning however, I was able to take a shower in my own building without having to carry 20 pounds of gear a mile and a half away:-D Simple things, but boy do they make a difference. So I was able to be very lazy while getting ready this morning, and STILL get to work 45 minutes early:) There really isn't much right now that could spoil my good mood, well, at least until the bosses come in ROFL. Then it might be a different story. I know I shouldn't let it get to me, but sheesh, there is only so much torture one girl can stand:)
Well, here comes everyone else, time for me to be off.

Tearing ones hair out

Metaphorically speaking of course, but I do feel like doing that around here on a regular basis. There are days where it seems to be ok, and then there are days where I swear if one more person says my name, I will scream.
Thankfully there are anidotes to this feeling. Friends, Privacy in my room to watch my shows, etc. I work very hard to maintain a cheery feeling around this place, I just hope it's worth it. If there is one thing I WOULD like to be said about me (Rather than all the things that ARE said about me LOL) is that I would like it to be said that I cheer things up in an otherwise miserable place.

August 11, 2004

My favourite days

Have now become Tuesday and Wednesdays. Tuesdays because one friend comes here and I get to see him:-) and Wednesdays because I go see a friend. That holds me through the rest of the week:) I am feeling pretty good today, despite convoys and otherwise hating to drive a truck that is twice as big as I am. I enjoyed the company of good friends and got to actually slack off all day:) Always fun.
Oh, An update after last nights depressing blog: My friend and I have made up, and are friends once more. So, all in all, life is good.
"I feel good, shananananana, the way that I should, shananananana, I feel nice, like sugar and spice................." Ok, no more singing:)

August 10, 2004

Pain

I hurt someone today, and I am not too sure how to repair things. I have a bad habit of doing that, as those who read this can testify. What am I doing? It wasn't intentional in the least, though it never is, is it? For once, I have no rhyme or reason, no excuse. Nothing more than, I am sorry from the depths of my heart.
Hell just came back in the form of my other boss, to make my evening worse. I guess it's karmic revenge of a sort. I caused pain, so now pain shall be caused upon me.

Oh Happy Days

So I got to see my friend for only about an hour, but just spending an hour talking to him, in person as opposed to our usual emails, is enough to make me feel so much better for the rest of the day:-D Sometimes it's the simple things in life, such as the ability to sit down face to face and talk that we take for granted so much, that bring the greatest pleasure while deployed out here. In the words of someone near and dear to me: War is Hell.

Rare things

Good Mornings, a general feeling of well being. I dragged myself out of bed before the sun came up this morning to go to the gym, as I really need to start a fitness program. But I am proud of myself, for being as broke as I am, I ran 2 miles in 19:16. (For a little perspective, passing the PT test requires 2 miles in 19:56).
Also the knowledge that one of the few trusted friends I have in this forsaken place is coming to camp today helps. :-D
I also heard from one of my oldest friends that I haven't heard from in awhile. Despite the fact that we have a hard time keeping in touch, due to demands in both our lives, it is always an incredible day lifter to hear from him.
Well, as is apparent, there really isn't much going on upstairs right now, I am happy and contented, for the moment at least LOL:-D

August 09, 2004

Laughter and Music, The simple joys in life.

Occasionally a few things around this hellhole have the power to actually make me laugh out loud. Those are always nice to find, as all too often all it takes to cheer a person up is a good laugh. I know it works for me:-D
Music is another of those things that lifts and soothes ones soul in bad times. It is not unusual these days to see my little head bopping side to side to whatever song I am listening to on my Rio.

Clearing Barrels, Mascots, and other assorted items

When a young woman associates with a group of men, it is assumed, at least in my world, that she must be sleeping with some or all of them. Acting upon that assumption, people (Most of the time immature boys) then will contrive nicknames. See the above for a couple of examples. The difference between a bitch and a whore? The whore sleeps with everyone, The bitch sleeps with everyone but you. Conversations about sex run rampant in this place because we are all a wee bit frustrated, whether we admit to it or not. The thing is though, what is up with the double standard? Do you men not realize that women are just as bad? Men expect women to be demure, polite, when it comes to matters of sex, and when they meet one that is not afraid to discuss it, they become afraid of her. Out of their fear comes derision, to the point where they revile that one. I don't really care honestly, I am who I am, nothing more, nothing less. People don't understand why I have ceased to care about my reputation. The fact is, I could sit in my room and do nothing (Oh wait, I already do that), and I would still have a reputation as a runabout sue. I have learned that my very best friends are those that look beyond the reputation, that take the time to really know who I am, rather than who everyone thinks I am. People, as a general whole, are very shallow. They don't wish to take the time out to understand everyone, so they shuttle people into little cliches in their mind, and there they stay. They take what they see on the surface, and believe that to be the whole. Why do we do this? Is it because we are lazy?
Well, enough deep thinking from me, I'm hungry now, and the chow hall here actually has real food. Adios for now:-D

Ups, Downs, and In Between

Ok, Life hasn't been exactly pleasant lately for me, but it will get better. One can only hope that one's situation gets better rather than worse. As Mum says, One always needs to have hope, for without hope there is nothing. Ok so I probably twisted that about a bit (Sorry Mummy), but you get the idea. I know I have been kinda dreary, but don't worry, I'll pick up again soon.
Woke up entirely too early this morning, to do PT with my section. I HATE getting up early, but I feel better now for having done it. Hopefully I feel better all day, because it looks to be a LONG day.

August 08, 2004

Laundry, Databases, and abnormal living.

Well, after a week of trying to do so, I finally was able to do my laundry. I needed to badly to as I was down to my last few pairs of socks and T-shirts. Never a good thing. But first of course, as I never get a total day off to myself, I had to come into the office and get my various spreadsheets done and sent off to their respective persons. Thankfully that didn't take too much of my time and I was able to run away for a wee bit to do my laundry and then go to the pool. I only spent an hour at the pool, as I forgot my sun lotion and had to borrow some. Besides, the pool here is kinda boring, no one really does anything besides sit or hang from the sides. yaaaawn. I prefer to play and have fun. I went home, and then decided that I probably should make some attempt at cleaning my room. Not that it was horribly messy or anything, just that it needed straightening up. So after doing that, I cooked dinner (Mac and Cheese with Pork and Beans for those interested) and started watching Stargate. Of course, since I can't do that without interruptions, about mid way through the episode, my boss came in and told me that I needed to get to the office and send off a document, as apparently I am the only one capable of doing so. Just once, can I get through the day without someone screaming my name?! This place is enough to almost make one not care about anything! If it weren't for a few select persons I call friends, that I do occasionally get to see, as they are not on this post, I would go insane.

Sleepless nights and stressful days

Life continues on here, stupid as ever. Yesterday's remarkebly dumb thing was a discussion on whether or not the females were allowed to wear bathing suits at the swimming pool, as that would be civilian clothing and we are not authorized to wear civilians! I was sent to see the big man up top, who promptly yelled at me for not going through proper channels. When a solider can not ask am simple question about uniform policy, what have we come to? Is this person's head too big for their shoulders now?! It turned out alright though thankfully, because just once, common sense actually prevailed and we will be allowed our swimsuits.
But days like this lead to a night like I had last night, where I was unable to shut down on my own without chemical assistance (Which I broke down about midnight and took). And because I don't sleep, I get stressed during the day. It is a vicious cycle.
But, I am used to it, so I will survive. All I have to remember is that it is only a few more months before we return home and then I will have the solitude and peace that I crave.

August 06, 2004

Late nights

It is yet again a late night for me, after an even longer day when if it could have gotten any dumber it did! I had to be kicked out earlier to go eat. I get started on something, and I don't like to leave it. I despise leaving things unfinished.
Right now I really wish I could curl up in someones arms, and just be comforted by their very presence. It is a hard feeling to describe, the immense lonliness that I feel at times such as these, when I just want to be reminded that someone does care. Oh well, I suppose I shall survive, just as I always have.

Various degrees of stupidity

Just when I think things couldn't get any more inane, they do. I do believe that my unit has lost all common sense. It is incredibly frustrating to continually attempt things, and to hit my head on a wall everytime.

August 05, 2004

Mixed Messages (Another Rant)

Mixed Messages: One of those little things that makes me HOT. I really despise it when I am told to make something a high priority and complete it asap, and so I spend extra hours in the office to make it happen, and then to be told that oh, it can wait. Excuse me?!
Another one: We tell the soldiers that they will be getting mail 5 days a week vs 3 days a week. A morale booster. But no, when it is too "inconvienent","I'm not worried about it". Ooooook. So it isn't an easy thing to accomplish today. Wah. Life isn't easy and sometimes it is hard to make things happen, but in the end it is worth it, isn't it?
I put myself out there for people, let them know that if they need me, I am there, and people do take advantage of this. But I wonder sometimes, especially at those who come to me for assistance, yet who were not 5 minutes ago, trashing my name, what am I doing? I want to help, I do, but I find myself at wits end often times trying to do everything I can, yet running into slammed doors constantly. If I were to say, that's it, I quit, what would happen? Would I be less stressed, would that make me happier?

Mornings in the Office

In the office this morning, early as usual. I am a person of routine, I get up early, go through my morning ablutions, go eat, and usually am in the office between 0800-0820. This allows me to get into a work mindset before the crowd comes in. It is a comforting thing in a weird way, and if I don't have the chance to do so, the whole day gets thrown off.
This morning was a particularily good day, I opened my email to find a note from a friend, with a presentation attached to it that was very sweet! He definitly had a bit of time on his hands when he made it, and it made me smile:-D Always a nice way to start the day.
Living by a little lake is kinda nice at times. Although it is dirty, and if you get too close it smells, if you close your eyes and listen, you can hear the water lapping at the sides, and it is a soothing sound.

August 04, 2004

The Prison

Well, after a few hiccups and coughs this morning, we were off to the prison. As much as I despise where I am living now, I do remember why this place is just slightly better. For starters, I do so hate running around with 30 extra pounds of equipment on just to go eat chow! Anyway, no matter the differences, it all boils down to this: Iraq just plain sucks.
I did have a pretty good day though, as I had nothing major to do, so got to goof off all day with a couple of my buddies. We spent the day talking about anything and everything, but mostly military stuff. I realized just why I haven't had a serious relationship with a civilian in over 4 years now: I have nothing in common with them! I associate better with those that have a better understanding of my lifestyle.
Since I have been here, I met all kinds of people from all over, NG or reservist. Being in an active duty unit, often times the only people I know are active duty. But we are out here, we have a NG unit attached to us, and we worked next to a reservist unit while at the Prison. It is an interesting look at life in both the Army and Civilian, the balance between soldier and man/woman. They are often looked down upon for their choice of branches, but I don't see why they should be. Often times, the NG or reserve unit is just as good, if not better than the active duty unit. These men and women must give up careers, lives to be deployed. I do not say this to diminish the active duty soldier, but often times, we do not see just how great the sacrifice that is made by our counterpart in the NG/Reserves. Perhaps if we did, there would be a greater understanding, and a better ability to work together.
I was going somewhere, but my train of thought just jumped the tracks again! He He He. Long, HOT day. And of course it isn't over. We have a major event happening Sunday, and it has fallen to me to be prepared, so now that I have lost a day in working, I must make up for it tonight. Not really an issue, as I have no life anyway, but I did want to watch more Stargate.
You know, during the day, all these wonderful ramblings occur to me, but I have no means to jot them down, and I lose them. Oh well.
Well to all who read this, greetings, and GOODNIGHT.

August 03, 2004

Swimming, eating, and getting hit on

Being a female in Iraq is not really that fun, but occasionally there are funny points to it. Example: Myself and 2 other girls were sitting at dinner tonight, when we were engaged in conversation by 3 Brits sitting next to us. Forgive me, it was 2 Brits and a Scotsman. Either way, the conversation devolved rapidly, and soo we were all laughing at such things as why the US has the World Series (Baseball for those dorks out there), yet we are the only ones who play, or why we have Iced tea. To them, that is babaric. It simply isn't done. As we left, one of my compatriots and I were discussing the gentlemen. (I said "Goodnight Gentlemen" to which one responded "oh I am not that", so I asked him if he was an "arsehole" instead!) Anyway, she seemed rather insistent that they were hitting on me specifically, to which I pointed out that while they were doing considerable flirting, it was directed at us as a whole. It did make for an enjoyable dinner though, much different than my usual meals alone with my food and my bood.
Back to the first subject in my title. I went swimming today for the first time in a long time. The pool is a small one that sits by one of the lakes on post, and is 6ft deep, all the way across. Me being 5'4", this was a slight issue. I treaded (I have no idea what word to use here) water for quite sometime, dunking people right and left, and when my back was turned, being dunked myself. Of course, now I am going to hell, as one of the persons dunked was the Chaplain. Hey, he started it by threatening to pull me in:-D
While hanging out on the side looking around, I talked to one of the ISG civilians that was also there about the camp. There was an old Baath party building across the lake from where we were, and according to tale, there are still dead bodies in the theatre that was bombed last year during the war.
The camp is an interesting mish mash of interesting architecture. While some of the buildings are very plain, and functional, such as the buildings I work and live in, others are beautiful.
I think I am off to bed now. I am going to AG in the morning to provide administration support. Yay. (Yes, that was sarcasm:-)

Killing time

Somedays I have to wonder about people around here. I say things, I email things, but yet they don't listen. I am under the wire from above, and can't do anything because I haven't the information that I need!
Then, from below, I have to deal with people who somehow think that I am 3, not 23. And of course as a result of that assumption, they then feel the need to question every move I make. The last time I checked, I had earned the rank on my collar by being competant at what I do. Granted, this is not what I was trained to do, but I work hard and learn what I can. If I do not know something, I ask. It's as easy as that, I am not about to jump off of a cliff without first making sure that there is something to slow my fall.

The Beginning

Since this will actually be read by other people than myself, I am not sure how to proceed. Mummy kept my diary online, and I think I will do the same, save for certain parts of course. You guys can't know everything about me:-D
It is August 3rd and I am sitting in my new offices in Camp Deutsch, located in Camp Slayer, near BIAP in Iraq. Confusing enough? I know. This place isn't that awful, at least we don't have to wear gear walking all over the place, and I now have a bike to ride to chow and such. We even have a swimming pool on post that we can go to. Not that I will frequent it, it is still quite sunny out and I have no intention of burning. The building I work in smells of cat pee unfortunatly, but it has become the running joke, and to be quite honest, most of us who work here become accustomed to it during the day. The place where I live is quite crowded and infested with ants, but so long as we are careful with food we don't have a problem. As we have no showers nearby, we have to ride about 3/4 of a mile away to shower trailers. Hopefully soon we will have our own.
This place gets more and more frustrating though. I quit smoking finally, and I am thinking I should have waited! I have around 4 more months left here, and I am still steadily going insane.